-FRIDAY-

dardar went to meet his frens at WEST COAST carpark~!(chit chat) i didnt wan to go aft our last quarrel...he said tt i knt stay out late.. den haf to send mi home early.. as if its my fault!!mummy don allow ma.. wat cn i do?? anyway, he's gg to west coast big big carpark jus to chat wif a bunch of frens abt car stuff.. wat cn i do there?? i don even noe abt cars?? diao diao lo~!! so aft work went to meet yan kai.. we went coffee bean talking abt his n my prob.. haix.. too mani prob le.. v fan ar...~ aft tt, took cab hm.. wasnt feeling v good cux i took coffee!! haas.. anyway, my dear frens in case u all dunno..i kena tk coffee..i oso dunno y.. will feel v uncomfortable..feel lyk vomitting..*hate tt feeling** so went staight fer bed aft bathe..ard 3plus i heard my fond vibrating.. i saw dardar gave mi 9 missed call n 1 msg!! 1st time he gave mi so mani miss call... **called him back** guess he wasnt v happy cux i didnt call him wen i reach hm.. he ask mi wher did i went i jus said tampines.. but he wan mi to tell him e extact place i went..so, he was even more pissed~!! he don lyk mi gg out 1 to 1 wid a guy.. i did tt is bcux all my gf's haf to acc they're bf.. some r even workin.. n i so bloody fan lo.. dardar went to meet his frens.. den i oso go meet my frens since yan kai msg mi at e point of tym..i wasnt happy aft e last quarrel wid him so i need someone to talk to.. so do he?(yan kai).. he jus broke up wid e gf.. still deciding if wanna patch up wid her...fan ar!! hen fan ar~!!


-SATURDAY-

msg-ed dardar said i've reach workplace le.. but he didnt reply o even call mi.. so im so angry n sad~!!arghh~!!i didnt wan to call him since i alrdy msg him......*mayb his bzy..mab he's angry??* but its alrdy midnight he still didnt call mi e whole fucking day.. *PISSED* y must i always always make de 1st move lei?? don wan don wan.. arghh.. **CRIED**



-SUNDAY-

i msg him in e morning **don come in n out of my life.. get ot if u wan to** he still don wanna reply mi.. (>.<) i called him.. he didnt wan to pick up.. **don care** call till he pick up.. hfpmm..~ aft awhile he pick up.. n we had a "giantantic" argument~!! **SOBX** he say we need to cool dwn~!! aft work went pub~!!! arghh.. i didnt wan to.. but aft e last quarrel.. i've been gg to pub v occastionly.. keep drinkin n smking.. arghh~!!! i noe tt's v silly.. but i jus cant help it.. i need to go out..so tt i wont call o msg him..! went back hm wif a 1/4 left of chivas bottle in my bag.. **THANK TO MY LIL IVY** **THANK TO SHEARES FOR E LIFT HM TOO** ^^


-MONDAY-

my off day..**having terrible sorethroat n cough** i drank quite alot ytd but i cant slp well e whole night.. i woke up but i keep forcing myself to slp.. lie on my bed till 1plus.. finally i get off my bed.. but aft wash up..i didnt noe wat to do.. so i ended up on my mom's bed...!lolx..i felt so helpless~!! i msg him *im really sorry** silly mi.. always giving in.. i oso dunno y.. haix.. he msged mi.. saying meet fer supper o late night movie later.. i didnt reply.. he called mi..i said anytin..im still v v sad.. but i've e mood to clean my rm and help my dog to bathe.. haas.. ard 6 plus.. evonne called mi.. ask mi to acc her to bugis ard 7pm to get sum stuff cux she gg back to malaysia soon.. ard 8pls he say he wanna pick mi up.. so soon?? i told him tt von still haven get her tings done..! he want mi to help him stick his car..i said orh.. he said if don wan jus tell mi.. kaox!! im having sorethroat n cought lei~!!! arghh.. think he knt tahan le.. so he start to do by himself.. i called him ard 9plus.. he still sticking.. so, i told him tt im gg back hm myself.. but he wan mi to cab to his hse carpark to help him out... OKAY~! i went to e taxi stand.. its FULL of ppl Q-ing.. (u noe bugis?? taxi stand is always filled** i went opps(bugis v)board a cab wif NO AIRCON PLUS $3.30 extra charge..nvm~ he uncle dunno wher e fuck is puggol field~!! **get ot of e cab straight** so i walked till arab street.. no cabs wanna stop... arghh.. 10plus le worr.. freaking impaient!!! **TAHAN TAHAN** wen i was on e way walking back to bugis..no choice..have to join e fucking Q!!!haix... on e way ii....i saw cab!! sumone is alighting~!! YAHOO~!! board e cab to dar's place! FINALLY~~~!!!!! nice taxi uncle... he keep hearing mi coughin.. offer mi SWEETS!!! hao hao uncle.. *^^* aft i reach e carpark.. his whole bonnet is covered wif black carbon fibre sticker!! which cost $100over fer tt sticker!!!! **FAINT** he ruin e sticker. cux its too big fer 1 person to cover tt bonnet le..haix.. wasted.. wen to his place.. he go bathe.. i watch tv.. aft tt.. go hm!! he ask mi to eat.. i say i don wan.. was coughin.. throat bloody pain! don feel lyk eating.. ask him go eat.. he say e don feel lyk...reach my hse.. i bathe he use psp.. i use com he still using psp.. i switch off e com.. he say nt watch movie?? arghh~!! v tired ar~!


he ask mi if im happy wif him - *speechless*
i jus ask evonne if i still loves him.. mi myself.. dunno~! i've mixed feeling aft tt big quarrel n "giantantic" argument.. haix.. he said lots of tins tt i felt tt im a hopeless gf..individual side always has its own reason.. haix.. hwever i've change to b a beta n understanding gf.. he doesnt realise it.. he keep digging our history out to say mi..even though i didnt do it nw alrdy! haix...and he only gives mi a chance to perform.. once i didnt perform well fer tis prob.. e REST of e problems he wont share wid mi le..kaox.. is tis fair to mi??? **tien li he jai ar!!**


*will b posting out pictures as soon as i uploaded to my com.. SORRY!

别让爱你的人受伤..如果你不爱一个人,请放手, 好让别人有机会爱他/她...如果你爱的人放弃你,请你放开自己,好让自己有机会爱别人...有的东西你再喜欢也不会属于你的,有些东西你再留恋也注定要放弃..人生中有许多种爱,但别让爱成为一种伤害...有些缘分是注定要失去的,有些缘分是永远都不会有好结果的,爱一个人不一定要拥有,但拥有一个人就一定要好好的去爱他/她...男人哭了,是因为他真的爱了...女人哭了,是因为她真的放弃了...如果真诚是一种伤害,我选择谎言;如果谎言是一种伤害,我选择沉默;如果沉默是一种伤害,我选择离开...如果失去是苦,你怕不怕付出?如果迷乱是苦,你会不会选择结束?如果追求是苦,你会不会选择执迷不悟?如果分离是苦,你要向谁倾诉?很多事情都是后来才看清楚,很多事情当时一点也不觉的苦,然而我已经找不到来时的路...有一种爱,明明是深爱,却说不出来..有一种爱,明明想放弃,却无法放弃..有一种爱,明明是煎熬,却又躲不开..有一种爱,明知无前路,心却早已收不回来..什么是勇气?是哭着要你回来,要你再爱我..还是哭着看你离开..在未可预知的重逢,我们以为总会重逢..总会有缘再会..总会有机会说一声对不起..却没想过每次挥手道别,都可能是决别,每一声叹息,都可能是人间最后的一声叹息..



*P.S: even if u dunno hw to read.. pls ask ur frens to translate it to u..its v meaningful *^^*

** Breakfast at McDonald's **

" This is a good story and is true, please read it all the way through until the end! (After the story, there are some very interesting facts!):

I am a mother of three (ages 14, 12, 3) and have recently completed my college degree.

The last class I had to take was Sociology.

The teacher was absolutely inspiring with the qualities that I wish every human being had been graced with.

Her last project of the term was called, 'Smile.'

The class was asked to go out and smile at three people and document their reactions.

I am a very friendly person and always smile at everyone and say hello anyway. So I thought this would be a piece of cake.

Soon after we were assigned the project, my husband, youngest son, and I went out to McDonald's one crisp March morning.

It was just our way of sharing special playtime with our son.

We were standing in line, waiting to be served, when all of a sudden everyone around us began to back away, and then
even my husband did.

I did not move an inch... an overwhelming feeling of panic welled up inside me as I turned to see why they had moved.

As I turned around I smelled a horrible 'dirty body' smell, and there standing behind me were two poor homeless men.

As I looked down at the short gentleman, close to me, he was 'smiling'.

His beautiful sky blue eyes were full of God's Light as he searched for acceptance.

He said, 'Good day' as he counted the few coins he had been clutching.

The second man fumbled with his hands as he stood behind his friend. I realized the second man was mentally challenged and the blue-eyed gentleman was his salvation.

I held my tears as I stood there with them.

The young lady at the counter asked him what they wanted.

He said, 'Coffee is all Miss' because that was all they could afford. (If they wanted to sit in the restaurant and warm up, they had to buy something. He just wanted to be warm).

Then I really felt it - the compulsion was so great I almost reached out and embraced the little man with the blue eyes.

That is when I noticed all eyes in the restaurant were set on me, judging my every action.

I smiled and asked the young lady behind the counter to give me two more breakfast meals on a separate tray.

I then walked around the corner to the table that the men had chosen as a resting spot. I put the tray on the table and laid my hand on the blue-eyed gentleman's cold hand.

He looked up at me, with tears in his eyes, and said, 'Thank you.'

I leaned over, began to pat his hand and said, 'I did not do this for you. God is here working through me to give you hope.'

I started to cry as I walked away to join my husband and son. When I sat down my husband smiled at me and said, 'That is why God gave you to me, Honey, to give me hope.'

We held hands for a moment and at that time, we knew that only because of the Grace that we had been given were we able to give.

We are not church goers, but we are believers.

That day showed me the pure Light of God's sweet love.

I returned to college, on the last evening of class, with this story in hand.

I turned in 'my project' and the instructor read it.

Then she looked up at me and said, 'Can I share this?'

I slowly nodded as she got the attention of the class.

She began to read and that is when I knew that we as human beings and being part of God share this need to heal people and to be healed.

In my own way I had touched the people at McDonald's, my son, instructor, and every soul that shared the classroom on the last night I spent as a college student.

I graduated with one of the biggest lessons I would ever learn:

UNCONDITIONAL ACCEPTANCE.

Much love and compassion is sent to each and every person who may read this and learn how to

LOVE PEOPLE AND USE THINGS - NOT LOVE THINGS AND USE PEOPLE.

There is an Angel sent to watch over you.

In order for her to work, you must pass this on to the people you want watched over.

An Angel wrote:

Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart.

To handle yourself, use your head.

To handle others, use your heart.

God Gives every bird its food, but He does not throw it into its nest. "